Hey, a boyfriend or a girlfriend can be 'friends that you trust'. And trust me, everybody else is in the same boat as you, okay? We look at our -- [there's a very, very tiny pause] parents, or some other example, and they seem to have it all together, so we go why isn't that me? But you have to realize, they had years to figure each other out. And they screwed up just as much along the way. We're just seeing their highlight reel.

[He tries to keep his tone firm. It's okay to 'screw up'. Hell, experience is the best teacher, right?]

For other things, depends on the person. Some people like oral sex. But hell, massages can count too. And I slept with this girl once who loved hearing poetry. There's no clear-cut thing I can tell you that everyone's going to love.

[... And then Jim gets the most perplexed, vaguely unsettled look on his face.]

Listen, have you ever--

[Oh god he's actually asking this question. Give him a minute.]

-- You know. With yourself? Solo?