tushanshu_logs | Oh lord, I have been sold; that I must take the unforsaken road...

"Sure. Whatever you want." She pauses, eyes on her water glass for a second before she says, "Thanks again for looking out for me. I owe you one. Can I ask... The kedan that, um- that you went to talk to, did they...?"

Say anything about her? Cause any more trouble? Get their friend? One of those.

"No you don't," he says, and pokes her fingertips with his own. "You're welcome, though."

Steve gives her a little time to finish the question before he chooses his answer. "We came to an understanding."

... what Rikki cannot say or do, Bucky, who can catch well enough the currents in the room, can. He reaches to grasp Steve's arm, solidly, as his friend moves back past him, and looks up into the blue eyes. "Be careful." And he means it. He doesn't need to see his granddaughter with a broken arm and pale with pain still, to know that things are dangerous, right now.

Then he nods, echoing the girl's sentiment, and lets him go, turning back to her.

"I'm used to stupid, it was kinda a common condition between him and me, at one time." Small grin that slightly warms his worried eyes, and he settles on a chair near her.

"Hungry, yet? Thirsty? And don't move that, yet, there'll be time enough for that, okay?"

"Good call, especially if she knows you." Bicky's voice lowers, correspondingly to the new information, and he does wink a bit at Rikki when she replies to him. He's just reminding, not berating.

After a moment, he settles a small package on the table nearest to where Rikki sat.

"These are for as needed, I will get more, if it's necessary. Keep out of the reach of children. And don't be hesitant to call out if you need anything. Either of you."

It's important to remind them... not that they are either of them at an age or with a background where they are likely to do it.

She gives him a long, uneasy look. "What does that mean? They, um... didn't really seem like they were in a mood to talk."

"I didn't kill them, Rikki," he says, quietly. "If that's what you mean. But I made it clear what would happen if they made more trouble with my people."

Rikki flushes a little, embarrassed that the thought even crossed her mind. "Okay. I didn't think that you--" She breaks off and takes a drink, shaking her head. "There were rules for Avengers where I'm from. About that sort of thing. I guess it just... surprised me."

"Rules?" He prompts her to go on, without feeling or judgement in his tone. He wants to know.

"Avengers don't kill. Not while they're Avengers, anyway. And I know your team's new, and different, but I just thought that was one of the things that would be the same. I don't know why."

He puts a hand over hers, rough and calloused and cut up from his bare-fisted encounter with one of the turtle's deserted towns. "You know, when I first got here? I asked Batman if he'd teach me. I'm good, but I've only been at this for... two years, three at most. Not sure how it works with the timelines. Anyway, he told me if I wanted to learn from him I had to promise not to kill. That was the only way he'd take me as a pupil. And I said no."

Steve gives her hand the barest pressure of a comforting squeeze, even more careful than usual about his strength. "I won't make promises I'm not sure I can keep. And the Avengers - these Avengers - the first thing we fought together was an alien invasion. We couldn't just knock them out. We didn't know how to disable them. We made the decisions required to do what needed to be done. I'm a soldier. Sometimes that means visiting death on the enemy."

He sits back. "Maybe some day I'll be able to say that isn't the case. But not here, and not until I know my people are safe, one way or another. You... Is that the first time you saw someone get killed like that?"

Edited 2013-04-12 04:58 (UTC)

She groans softly. "Definitely not hungry." Though she's shaky and dizzy and maybe should eat, but the thought of food makes her queasy all over again. "Thirsty, though."

And she could really use a hug, but she doesn't know how to actually say that, even if she's relatively sure Bucky would give it.

Rikki's head snaps up when he says how long he's been doing this. She knew he was younger than her Cap, of course, there's no ignoring that, but if that's true... she's been a hero longer than he has. That's a little more than she's prepared to wrap her head around right now.

She swallows hard, taking a moment to drag her brain back on track when she realizes he's actually asking her a question. She's been listening, just... also having her whole world view turned around yet another time.

"No. Yeah. I mean..." Her eyes drop to the table again, her voice getting soft. "I've seen people die before. A few times. But it's not usually... like that, and it's usually 'cause of the bad guys."

One she walked in on Natasha in a room full of bodies, spattered in blood, but... the Black Widow is different. She has her own set of rules.

"Got it."

Softly, and he drops the stuff he's brought on the kitchen counter, pours her a big glass of water - and comes in to deliver both things she wants. By gently shifting her so she can lean back against him and drink her water comfortably, and without much effort.

Yes, she should eat. Yes, there are many things they should both do. But, for a little bit, he'll just be there with her. Reassuring himself that. She's still there. Not gone. Not--

He bites his tongue against a sharp intake of breath, and murmurs quietly, calmly, instead, "did I ever tell you I'm glad you told me? Who we are to each other, I mean?"

Something about how she says it, because of the bad guys, hurts in a way he doesn't expect.

"I'm sorry you saw it," he says. That much is true. In another fight, without the heat of that moment and the drive to get the attackers away from her - if it had been him and only him at risk, maybe it would have gone differently. But he's killed men for Bucky's sake. He'd kill again for Rikki's.

Whether or not she'd have him do it is a separate question.

He takes a deep breath. "Do you want me to make that promise?"

Edited 2013-04-12 05:42 (UTC)

"It's okay. I mean, you don't have to apologize for saving me, that's-"

She blinks at him for a second, like the question doesn't even make sense to her. After a moment, she shakes her head.

"I don't know. I don't think that should be my decision."

"I'd do it for you," he says. He would do it for most of those he loves. But she's right, and it's the same reason he said no to Batman in the end. Steve raps his knuckles absently against the table before he replies. "I don't want you think less of me because of something you've seen me do. I never want that."

"I don't!" she says immediately, with maybe a little more force than necessary. "I don't think there's anything you could do that would make me, and this... I know why you did it. It makes sense, and they were gonna kill me, so I guess if there was ever a good reason...

"It's just weird for me. Maybe scared me a little." She reaches out to grab his hand now, squeezing his fingers with a smile. "You're still my best friend, and I still wanna be you when I grow up. 'kay?"

Rikki lifts her head to smiles gratefully at Bucky, giving a tiny half-hearted salute with her good hand. "Yes, sir."

She's not actually used to calling for help even when she does need it, but maybe broken bones will make her more inclined to accept her own limits. Maybe.

Noticing Tommy hovering awkwardly, she smiles faintly to herself before glancing back to Steve and Bucky. "Can I go to bed now? I promise I'll lock all the doors and windows, and I'll call you to let you know how I'm doing whenever I wake up."

She shifts against him gratefully, and when she's downed half the glass of water, she drops her head against his shoulder. Her whole body's wound up with adrenaline and stress and pain, but now she deflates a little against him.

It's easier to relax with the physical reminder that he's there and she's safe and protected. After all, even if he's not the man who raised her, he's still her grandpa. He's not going to let anything happen to her.

"Yeah? 'Cause I wouldn't blame you if you miss when you didn't have to deal with this dumb kid in your life."

It is much easier to relax with the physical contact. Especially after what had happened with Natasha, with Favrielle gone, with Molly - changing. Even if it's only knowledge that Molly got, about her future, it's still changed her. Shaken her.

And now Rikki got hurt, and he is by now aware that it might have been worse, if Steve hadn't gotten there on time.

"Well, I'm used to dumb kids. Wouldna' know what to do without you." Kid from Brooklyn, too dumb to run away from a fight. That's what he said, and it's... still true.

"Besides, who'd have taught me to fly up the rooftops if not for you?"

Rikki laughs a little. "There's a lot of people here that could teach you that, I think. But it was fun doing it. And I'm glad I told you too. Can't imagine getting by here without you."

She takes another drink, and then closes her eyes as she settles back against him. "I passed out. I got the crap beaten out of me and broke both my thumbs once and didn't pass out. This's just embarrassing."

"Yeah, but you're the one who did, so there."

There's a smile to his voice, but then it fades, and he tucks his chin over the top of her hair.

"We've been running a lot on very little, here." Quiet voice. "And it makes a difference, how ready you are for the pain. When you're prepared, you can brace yourself and push through. When you ain't..."

It was worse, back under Zola, when they were working on him while he was blindfolded. This much, he remembers.

"...why'd you break your own thumbs?"

"I guess. It makes sense. Still feels kind of dumb, y'know?"

She snorts softly at the question, smiling a little without opening her eyes. Okay, it really wasn't fun at the time, but looking back she is pretty proud of herself for surviving it. And maybe impressing Black Widow a little too.

"Getting out of handcuffs. I was doing this thing with Black Widow, and we got caught, and... it's a long story. But SHIELD taught me how I could do that if I ever needed to."

The Earth Sector is as far out as he gets. Work is all but impossible now - so all he has time for is restless wandering. He knows every inch of the place now, he could walk through it blindfolded if he had to.

It's suspicious that this street is empty at this time of day. Even more so when there's apparently only one person there, who looks quite familiar, so he approaches.

'You're thinking quite loudly,' he remarks amiably.

Tommy peers at the package that's placed on the counter with curiosity, still shifting uneasily on his feet (he always did that when someone of authority was around.) He's relieved when Rikki makes for them to leave, shifting so he's beside her, to get a better look at her arm and the mystery package.

"And even if any kedan did get in, Molly would totally pummel them before they got past the door. She makes a good guard kid," he smiles, weakly.

Oh lord, I have been sold; that I must take the unforsaken road...

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