tushanshu_logs | time it took us // to where the water was

_{( Jason manages to snort out a half-laugh, but when Percy looks at him like that, he can't really meet his eyes. He's barely talked to anyone about this--Piper and Leo included--and for some reason, it feels like a weakness. And he definitely doesn't want to expose his weaknesses to Percy.

He shrugs, tries for nonchalance. )}

Juno was angry, when I was born. Because my dad fell for my mom twice. It was the only way to calm her down, and the Roman-Greek divide didn't help.

I mean, it's not like I remember any of that happening. I didn't even know until I met Thalia again, a few months ago. Before that, Camp Jupiter was just where I'd always been. It's always been home.

_{( And now, it's not. He's a traitor and the camps are at war and everything is awful. So, that's great. )}

[Percy's jaw clenches a little, but even he can tell from the way Jason doesn't quite meet his gaze that this probably comes under the subject of 'things we don't talk about'. Percy tries to imagine how he'd feel if his mom had given him up, and finds that he can't.

He definitely knows how to feel mad at the gods, though.

There's a pause from Percy, before he sighs, giving his head a shake] When I was thirteen, my friend Grover - the satyr I was talking about - got kidnapped by a Cyclops. Polyphemus. The only way he was able to not get eaten was by wearing a wedding dress and agreeing to marry him.

[yes, Percy is telling dumb stories to lighten the mood]

_{( Jason doesn't realize it, himself, but his personality doesn't lean much to levity. Even his humor is kind of serious, sardonic in a way. But he can't help but laugh at Percy's story--or at least, he chokes a bit, which is as much a laugh as anyone's going to get out of him if they aren't named Piper or Leo.

After a moment he runs a hand over his face, trying to hide the remains of a smile. )}

People talk about him a lot. At Camp Half-blood. But he was gone searching for you the whole time I was there.

[Percy gives a lopsided grin in return, recognising the sound for what it is. He's kind of pleased he managed to get that much out of the other guy, if he's honest.

The grin turns into an expression of true happiness when Jason says that. In contrast to the Roman, Percy's as open with his emotions as ever.] They do? I mean, they were talking about him when I was there, but it was right after the Battle of Manhattan. Everyone was talking about everything, then. He deserves the recognition. [The smile becomes more subdued then, though, before ultimately fading] Yeah. I was the only one who got knocked out, but it's like everyone else's life got put on hold, too.

[There's guilt in his tone, and anger. He tries to hold back a sudden spike of bitterness towards Jason. Jason, who had been considered stable enough to be conscious in the interim months]

_{( Jason shifts awkwardly. It had been a sharp jealousy, when he'd found out that Thalia was searching for Percy. That hadn't been fair, but he'd still felt it. And then, getting back to Camp Half-blood, finding Percy had been the task on everyone's minds.

And then Jason had started piecing his own life back together, and had realized that Camp Jupiter would not have had the same response, where he was concerned.

It's not even worth the comparison. Romans have their ways, the Greeks theirs. And yet, he can't help but draw the comparisons. )}

Maybe they just needed something to talk about.

Or there just wasn't enough else going on at Camp, with you gone.

_{( A shrug there, like he's unsure if he's being light or serious. )}

[Percy snorts] There's always something going on at Camp.

[He's silent for a moment, almost brooding. Percy's always tried not to linger on things, especially not the things the gods get up to, but it's like he's been pushed one step to far this time. His next words just kind of leap out of him] You know what really gets me? If she'd just asked, I probably would've said yes. It's not like any of us are exactly strangers to making sacrifices to save the world. I get why the Camps couldn't know in general, but Annabeth dropped out of school to look. My mom-- [He shakes his head.]

Treating us - treating demigods like they're just tools to be used, that's what made Luke Castellan happen. They couldn't even last two whole months without slipping back into their old ways.

_{( Jason pauses, swallows and presses his lips together. He's uncertain of what to say to in a way that makes him decidedly uncomfortable. He's always had his own issues with the gods, but he never articulates them to others. He just can't. )}

Maybe it wouldn't have worked. If she'd asked, first.

_{( It's something he's been considering for a long time, now. )}

Jun--Hera--argh, you know what I mean--she told me things have to happen a certain way. That we have to make our own paths. And maybe if we'd been even a little bit prepared, things wouldn't have worked.

_{( He pulls a face, at the end of that. He's not yet sure that things did "work." )}

I can't decide which is worse--being used, or radio silence. _{( Since the Romans, for all they honor the gods, have decidedly done their own thing for awhile. Jason asks that almost like a question, like he wonders about Percy's opinion on that difference. )}

Maybe it wouldn't've. But that's - it's part of the problem with everything about how they do things, you know? They don't try to find ways to make it work anyway. They don't have to, because they're gods.

[That bitterness is still there, but it's...measured. Percy isn't just ranting, and he's never going to be the guy (Luke) who advocates some kind of war against the gods. But he's definitely taking advantage of the fact that they aren't here to listen (and smite) to vent a little.

That face gets a wry smile from Percy, because he's not sure it worked, either. Considering how things stand between the Camps right now. He catches the invitation to comment at the end of Jason's words, and shockingly, actually pauses to think] I think...they're both bad, just in different ways. I mean, who wants to be put in that position? Oh, you can talk to your dad, but you have to jump through hoops and put your life and the people you care about in danger before he'll look at you twice?

Maybe when you've been doing something the same way for thousands of years, you forget how to change.

_{( He's thoughtful, his frustrations hidden beneath reserve.

Jason nods, at Percy's answer, until he stops to just blink at him. Something he said... )}

You've talked to your dad?

Yeah. But maybe when the whole world nearly gets destroyed because you forgot how to change, you should start remembering. You know? It shouldn't have taken what it did just to get them to start acknowledging their kids.

[Come on Jason, be frustrated with Percy! Except Percy blinks back, and then doesn't quite get it when he responds] Oh, I mean - not since Zeus shut up shop or anything. Which is still weird, he doesn't usually like...listening to your dad.

Do you like being told you're wrong? Because I don't. I think it's probably worse if you're a god.

_{( He really doesn't empathize with them to that extent but talking about frustrations to others is hard!!

And still just. Gaping at Percy. )}

...but you've met your dad.

[Percy opens his mouth, because he'll accept that he's wrong, sometimes. But the look on Jason's face coupled with his tone completely takes him by surprise]

You haven't?

_{( Jason abruptly clears his throat and his shoulders tense. )}

Roman gods don't interact directly with their children very often. And my dad has to follow the rules he sets. As an example.

That's bullshit. [The words practically explode out of Percy, but the outrage is on Jason's behalf, not at his reaction] They're stupid rules. And the rules he sets are what made everything about this situation possible to begin with. Your dad can spare the time to threaten to smite me on more than one occasion, but he can't drop by to say hello to you? What's up with that?

You've met my dad.

_{( The words tumble flat out of his mouth, with no inflection whatsoever. But sparks jolt from his fingers, and a small bolt of lightning runs down his sword and hits the dirt with considerable force. Jason barely moves.

It's just so utterly, immediately unfair. Percy got to live with his mother, know her. Percy got to meet his father. Percy got to meet Jason's father. Jason's sister spent months of her life searching for Percy while she forgot her brother even existed. Percy's camp looked for him while Jason's assumed if he was weak enough to disappear, he wasn't worth the effort.

Stop it, he tells himself desperately. There's no point in this. And yet he has to clench his fists to keep from letting another lightning bolt loose, and suddenly he can't meet Percy's gaze. He looks up at the sky and glares openly at it. )}

Forget everything I just said. I don't understand them at all.

Edited 2013-06-23 06:50 (UTC)

[There's a pause in which you can practically see Percy going o o p s. He opens his mouth, shuts it again, and feels like crap. So much for having a handle on his temper, these days.

He can't even apologise, because...other than his delivery, what's he supposed to be sorry for? Sorry the gods suck? That isn't something even Percy can claim as his fault]

It - I mean, it was Zeus. [It's clear he's trying to salvage something here] And it wasn't me seeing him so much as it was me ending up in front of all of the Twelve. The first time he made it really clear that he wanted to kill me a little bit, and the second time he asked them to vote on it.

[There's a pained sound] I'm sorry, man. [He says it anyway. It's not pity, just the simple honesty that's characteristic of Percy. He clears his throat] Anyway, I'm probably not...the guy you want to talk about this stuff with.

_{( Jason just holds up a hand, eyes stormy but face carefully neutral. )}

It’s fine. I mean, I’d probably rather face Medea again that all Twelve at once. And anyway, what they do isn’t your—our—fault. _{( The joke is stale on his lips, and he can’t help but imagine what that scene must’ve been like. Does Percy look like his dad? What had he said to him? Was he proud of him, did he approve, or was he like Jason, groping around in the dark and hoping that he was doing the right thing even though he didn’t know, never knows, just hopes and falls back on what’s supposed to be right…

Jason sighs. )} I don’t talk to anyone about this.

_{( Not even Piper, even though talking to her is sometimes the only thing that keeps him calm. Not even Thalia, maybe especially not Thalia, because being Zeus’ child had never been a legacy she’d shouldered in the same way as Jason. )}

[Percy rubs the back of his neck] Yeah. Actually, now that I think about it, most of them don't like me. Annabeth's mom voted to have me dead, too. [This is Percy trying to make you feel better, bro. But his tone becomes more serious now] Yeah, I know it's not. But I didn't have to - go off like that. I wasn't thinking.

[Telling Jason that his dad came to his birthday party one time is definitely not on the to-do list. He picks his next words careful, in contrast to his previous word vomit] Maybe you should. I mean, not me, obviously, but to someone. You don't have to just accept this this is the fair and right and only way they could do things, you know? [He sighs, making a face] Great, I sound like my mom.

Would that be that bad? Sounding like your mom, I mean.

_{( He says that kind of ruefully. Percy's mom seems pretty smart. Jason stretches his arms over his head, still staring at the sky. The movement seems to unclench the tension in his back, and his muscles release all at once as he drops his gaze back down to the ground. )}

I don't just accept it, you know. But there's not a lot we can do about it, especially not from here.

[The comment gets Percy to smile like an actual dork, because his mom is the best] Yeah, okay, I guess it's not that bad. But it's the principle, you know?

[He falls quiet, absently capping Riptide back into a pen.] I don't know, the fact that we're even talking right now is proof that things can change, right? I mean, yeah, He - Ju - Heruno threw us together, but she couldn't force us to fight together instead of against each other. That was us. And if we can do that, why not change other things? [Because Tartarus something whisper in the back of his mind. Percy kicks that aside. Jason's not in Tartarus, after all]

_{( Jason raises both his eyebrows at the Heruno comment, opening his mouth to comment before decidedly shutting it again. But he almost--almost!!--laughs. Eventually he just crosses his arms over his chest and shakes his head. )}

Things are changed, already. The camps know about each other. The gods--some of them, at least--have helped us. When this is all over, things can't just go back to how they were.

_{( And he looks at Percy and thinks about Tartarus and just swallows, before deciding this is going to end well, with all 7 of them alive. )}

I guess it's just up to us to decide how they change.

[Percy catches that almost laugh, and just grins. For a second or two, he thinks that maybe he and Jason actually be friends, instead of just awkwardly coexisting in the same spaces.]

They won't want to change. You - we can't let them talk their way around this one. [His expression tightens a little at the way he stumbles over his pronouns, but he doesn't say anything about it. He casts around for another topic of conversation as well.]

Oh, um - you should know. Your Camp missed you. I mean, they were really, you know, Roman about it. But they did. [A beat] Except Octavian. That guy's an ass.

We.

_{( Jason repeats that firmly. He is utterly determined, and the fact that Percy and Annabeth are alive and well on the turtle means that he doesn't have to face facts anytime soon. )}

And Ocatvian's worse than an ass. He's... selfish. And petty. And everything a legionnaire isn't supposed to be.

_{( Jason shifts, then smiles. )} Your camp's better at feelings, I think.

[It's Percy's turn to look away now. He's usually the guy who'd be insisting on that we right away, but like they've been talking about - things have changed a lot.]

Yeah. We. [But not that much. His tone is just as firm.

Well, for a moment or two. A second later, he sounds more plaintive than anything else] And he guts perfectly good panda pillows, too. [Percy is the manliest] But no, I think I get what you mean. He acts like he's doing things on behalf of the Legion and New Rome, but he's really just out for himself. It sucks that he's so good at talking, because Reyna was doing a really good job.

[Percy shouldn't be so pleased with himself, but he totally is] Yeah, we're a kind of leap before looking bunch. It's home, but I still think there's a lot we could learn from Camp Jupiter. The other way around, too.

Panda. Pillows.

_{( Jason repeats that, too, not quite decided on whether he even wants to ask that question. Of course, he’s seen Octavian at work, but usually it’s puppies and teddy bears. Things that go for maximum childhood trauma.

Then he just shakes his head. )} Reyna’s what Octavian claims he is. She’s actually committed to the legion, she’s probably the least selfish person I’ve ever met. I think if she could’ve stopped… everything… she really would have.

_{( Talking about Reyna shouldn’t be this weird. But Jason had always been a bit nervous around her. They were both distanced from their peers, but in very different ways. )}

Right. If we can keep everyone from trying to kill each other.

time it took us // to where the water was

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