"You were close enough to him to make the connection, and to feel hurt from learning it. Would you have otherwise?"

The fact that she didn't comment on the other aspect is not surprising- even on Krypton the culture there focuses on the binary when it comes to how they relate to one another; Jor-El's once friendship with Dru-Zod before they ascended in their respective guilds was an oddity because they were of different families and were to be members of different guilds.