so long as you come home at the end of the day [July, catchall, open]

[ruinsprofessor]

Characters: Raine Sage and OPEN
Date: mostly after 9th July, as attitudes will differ markedly before and after
Location: Many places: special mention for apartment in Earth, Healers' Guild in Water
Situation: lots.
Warnings/Rating: hold on to your feels, Raine's misplaced her husband. warnings updated as things change.


A | Healers' Guild | Open

Before the ninth, business is as usual; Raine is brisk and efficient. After the ninth, she makes a level attempt to throw herself into work, at the Guild long hours and busy more often than not. She may be found in her office, sometimes awake, sometimes passed out over her desk with the door ajar; down in Solomon's old laboratory space, sifting through his research; or with patients. She seems more tired, and she smiles less frequently, but she doesn't do her job with any less dedication.

B | park in Earth sector, later in the month | Open

When the familiar surroundings of her apartment get too much, and she's been nudged out of the Guild by coworkers, Raine walks, takes herself out to watch people and keep herself moving. Often she stops in a park, a little ways away from the more traveled areas, and sits to meditate, pale light glowing under her and at her fingertips. Focusing on her magic helps: it won't abide distraction, and she gives all her attention to the clean peace of mana and light, rather than emotion.

As a result, she will be easily startled.

C | Wildcard??? | Open

D | apartment | Sheena

Raine allots herself a few days, not so much to work through the loss as to try to hammer out the nuances of working around it. It may not be the best strategy, but it's what she has. She's not oblivious, all the while, to the food that appears while her remaining roommate disappears, but it takes her some time to actually catch Sheena in the apartment.

On Sheena's day off she taps on the closed door of the room, frowning slightly to herself. It's beginning to seem like Sheena's avoiding her, and if something's wrong with Sheena, Raine would prefer to address it now, before it becomes something worse.

[ooc; if you'd like to plot, hit me up via pm or makaricrow. c: other than that, let me know specifically if you need Raine before the ninth for some reason, since her attitude and mood will differ drastically before and after.]

Comments

[ninjainviolet]

Sheena nods in understanding before commanding in a gentle tone, "Raine, look at me. The same was true on Atia, but whether it had been seen as a kindness or a necessity, I don't know." Nor does she know why Atia had changed that policy before deciding to send them all home. Nor does she mention that sometimes those returning had no memories of Atia as well.

Yet even knowing that chance existed, she hadn't stopped making friends because she knew that somehow, somewhere, they'd remember each other. Even if it was in a dream, since the heart can be more powerful than the mind at times. She tells her friend this, adding, "But who's asking you to not believe in that hope? I'm not. I'm also not asking you to stop doing so, or to stop researching, or to forget."

She grips her friend's shoulders.

"I'm asking you to let the pain and anger come out now, so you can control it, and not the other way around. Trust me... It'll help."

Remember her at the loss of Corrine? Yeah... She knows.

[ruinsprofessor]

Raine sighs, but when she looks at Sheena again there's something clearer about her expression, and, improbably, she's smiling, though her eyes are damp and watery.

"Thank you, Sheena," she says, and shakes her head. "But I can't. I... know I don't have to be strong. Even so..."

She isn't quite sure how to put this so Sheena will understand. It's not even that it's private -- which it is, Raine has always kept her emotions close to her chest, but Sheena's in a rare category, those friends who are almost closer than life -- but it's emotion so carefully chained that she doesn't know how to let it out without the rest that's built on it crashing down.

"I'm using it," she says finally, distantly. "This... this grief, this anger. Every time I go back over his notes, every time I'm reminded of him, it comes back. It keeps me going, I think. It reminds me why I'm working so hard. Because of this, so that no one else in our situation will have to feel the same thing. So that, perhaps, I can find him again. That's why I can't let go."

It isn't unlike when she was first abandoned with Genis, she finds. She herself managed to keep going for Genis: because she couldn't abandon him. That pain, and the love of her brother, is what pushed her forward. Without that driving force she wouldn't be here today.

She glances down, then up again. The smile is tremulous. "He fought so hard," she says. "To stay. Even a little longer."

[ninjainviolet]

There's nothing improbable about that smile at all. Sheena's seen--and even given a few of--them before, and recognizes it for what it is. A sad understanding and acceptance of things.

She returns it--even though a part of her can't accept part of this. But she's Sheena, and Raine is Raine. Just as Sheena can be considered the expert of giving in to her emotions and letting them out full force before reigning them in, Raine can be thought of as the complete opposite. Emotions held in check until triggered by something, and then they come out.

And that's the part that worries the ninja. That if her friend doesn't let them out under a controlled barrage, then they'll come out of their own free will at the wrong time. And if Raine confides into the younger woman her fears and uncertainty about how to go about it, Sheena more than likely will come up with a way for her to get through it and not lose anything.

"Raine," she begins before turning. "The problem with not letting go of the pain and anger is that eventually, that's all you'll have left. Nothing else." Turning suddenly, she says, "Here catch," before tossing her most prized possession to the mage.

Corrine's Bell.

"You know how much that means to me." Hell, she had fought for it--literally. "But I had to give it up for years at one point. And why could I? Because I had the memories--both good and bad--up here." And she taps her head. If Raine hadn't caught the Bell, the ninja will pick it up and put it in the mage's hand before placing her hand on her shoulder. "And each time those memories come back, there's something else that come with it: determination." Her grip tightens sightly in encouragement.

"And that's what I want you to do, Raine. Let go of the actual pain and anger, but remember them, and hang on to the determination all your memories--good and bad--bring you." Nodding towards the Bell, she meets the other woman's gaze with a solemn one. "And you can hold on to that for as long as you need to." As a focus or a catalyst--whichever will help her friend.

[ruinsprofessor]

Warned only by 'here, catch,' Raine fumbles the catch, nearly dropping the bell before she recovers it. When she does she freezes, recognizing what it is without much effort at all. "I can't take this," she protests. It's Corrine's memento-- it's Sheena's. "Sheena, I--"

Raine isn't even sure what she wants to say. She bites her lip for a moment, offering the bell back to Sheena in her open palm. "You don't need to do that," she says, more quietly, when she's collected a bit of herself. "I'll be all right. It's... raw, still. I miss him every day. But the worst of it will ease." In a moment she nods, as though to herself, still thinking over what Sheena's saying. It makes sense. It will take time, naturally, but she can likely manage. "I'll use it until then, and the memories after."

It's strange how many things in her life seem to come back to memory.

[ninjainviolet]

"Yes, you can," Sheena says quietly, closing her friend's hand over the bell. The tone is quiet, but there's a sternness there that won't brook any arguments from the woman. "And maybe I don't need to do this, but I want to." She gives her friend a gentle, understanding smile.

"I know." She doesn't have to say much more than that, since Raine knows she's speaking both the truth and from the heart. "But you don't have to go through it alone, and any time you feel things are getting out of control, just remember those who care about you--and will fight for you." And she squeezes the hand holding the bell for emphasis.

"For it's those memories that make you who you are, because all those people are a part of you."

[ruinsprofessor]

Raine presses her lips together, and finally nods, drawing her hand back to her heart by way of accepting the bell. "All right," she says, dipping her head. "All right."

She's quiet for several moments, assimilating Sheena's words and her decisions. It won't be fast or easy; but changes will happen, and Raine will remember. "Thank you, Sheena," she says at last, lifting her gaze again. "I'll give this back to you safely." She didn't know when, but she would keep the bell safe, and in the mean time use it for the purpose Sheena intended.

"...I'm going to remember. Somehow."

[ninjainviolet]

Good. Because even if she had managed to refuse the Bell, it would still have shown up in Raine's possession when the mage wasn't looking. Sheena could be very determined when she wanted to be.

And she was set on helping Raine get through this.

"You don't have to thank me. That's what friends are for." And that simple word "friends" included not only those back home and here, but the one whose Bell it was. "I know you will, Raine. But you hold on to it for as long as you need to."

Sheena's quiet for a moment before giving her friend an encouraging smile.

"You know what, Raine? I think you will. That you'll find a way."

[ruinsprofessor]

Raine tilts her head a little to the side, smiling wistfully in return. It's easy to believe, when Sheena says it like that, and when she isn't thinking of all the possible pitfalls and the reams of research yet to do. "Thank you," she says again, because there isn't all that much else left to say, and certainly nothing that will encompass the warmth in her heart. "I'm going to do everything in my power, and I hope that will be enough."

[ninjainviolet]

Chalk it up to the influence of a certain blond they both know that makes Sheena's belief in her friend so strong.

Of course, the going may be long and hard; Sheena knows that as well. What her friend wants to do isn't easy by any means. But then again, when had they ever let that stop them? And there's one very important thing that had allowed them to be able to do it before, and will help Raine now. Placing her hand on her friend's shoulder, Sheena smiles.

"And if you feel it isn't, you have people around you who will always help you, you know."