tushanshu_logs | Tomorrow morning when we wake

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Tomorrow morning when we wake

Characters: Pepper Potts, Marie Kreutz, Yami no Bakura and you!
Date: Throughout January
Location: Sky Sector, KPD Headquarters, and around Keeliai
Situation: Pepper is hanging out with friends and helping with storm recovery, enjoying the start of the new year
Warnings/Rating: None yet

A. Jade Dojo | Early January | Bakura

So they're still trying to figure out what exactly they are to each other and how this whole 'relationship' thing works, but Pepper is content with that situation. She'd worked with Tony to make a customized senet board for Bakura's birthday, but she'd left the pieces uncarved so he could make them himself and perhaps show her how to carve as well. Plus, she didn't really remember how to play, and Bakura had already proven to be an adept teacher. She stayed after the dojo closed, as had started to become habit, and wandered back towards his apartment.

B. House Spicy Iron Dragon | During the storm | Marie

Well, the weather is terrible. Pepper has seen the remnants of hurricanes that have petered out in New York, and a few really bad storms, but this definitely takes the cake. She probably won't admit it, but it makes her a bit uncomfortable. Between the weird weather and not being able to go outside much because of it, she needs something to do with her hands when she's not working. Marie had done some baking before she left, and Pepper asked if her returned housemate would be willing to spend time in the kitchen. It would be fun, and tasty, and hopefully give them time to get to know each other better.

C. Healer's Guild | Early January | Raine

As with Valdis' Shadow test, Pepper had been alerted to Raine's (albeit with a lot less urgency by Vee this time). She can't help but wonder what Raine saw - if it had the same sort of bone-rattling effect on her. Each test was different, wholly individualized, and Pepper is nothing if not curious. Raine might appreciate the comparison as a scientist and a mage, too. As has become something of a habit, Pepper brings treats along with her when she arrives at Raine's office, and knocks gently.

D. Around Keeliai | After the storm | Open

In the aftermath of the storm, there's a lot of repair work that needs doing, and once again Pepper's suit is perfect for the task. She can be seen wherever the worst damage is, pulling apart structures so waterlogged they would become rotten before too long, or helping with new construction. She keeps the faceplate open most of the time, even though the kedan have largely gotten used to the armor by now. Even though there's a lot of work to be done, she remains chipper and does whatever she can to help.

E. KPD Headquarters | Throughout the month | Open

Pepper continues to work diligently, though her schedule remains a bit erratic. She likes taking a variety of shifts. The early part of the month is fairly quiet, but she's preparing reports with Valdis and Gene to give to the Council as part of the push for laws and policies that has arisen.

After the storm passes, things get busier. In the wake of any disaster, there was potential for crime. When she wasn't out helping with repairs herself, Pepper was organizing patrols and doing logistics for aid parties, coordinating with other groups in the city like the Healer's Guild and the Council so they weren't reinventing the wheel.

F. Midnight Hotel | Beginning of January | Valdis

Pepper is still a bit worried about Valdis. Although she seems to have gotten her head on straight again in terms of immediate fallout from the failed Shadow test (and the fact that she survived was impressive), it must have left a mark. Pepper had passed, and it left a mark. Cookies in hand, she goes to see Valdis at the Hotel, sporting a smile but not trying to hide the fact that she's here for a specific purpose when she knocks.

(OOC: Feel free to make your own starter or let me know if you want something specific!)

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

"And I was answering seriously."

Valdis sighed, her anger deflating somewhat. Pepper might have been trying to help, but there were things she simply couldn't share, even if she probably should.

"What I want is a way to fight back," Valdis replied, "I'm tired of just letting it attack me."

She picked the book back up, tracing her fingers along the golden lettering.

"But, according to Bakura, I can't connect with it until I know all parts of myself, until I accept all parts of myself. How can I accept someone I don't even know?"

It was difficult not to make another snappish comment back at that; Pepper was young and far less experienced than Valdis in most things, but she didn't like being spoken to like a child. But that wasn't the central issue at hand, so the teen set it aside.

Valdis must be talking about Meira, the woman Pepper had met about a year ago. "Well... I guess a good start would be accepting that she exists, and not just on, like, a cognitive level. She's not gone, she's just... buried. What does it feel like when you remember what happened with losing your memories last year?"

The idea was a simple one, but everything was far more complicated than that.

"What does it feel like?" Valdis repeated, looking up at Pepper with a tucked chin, "It was like being a blank slate. I was her, but I didn't have any of her memories, or any of my memories for that matter. I felt so lost. I would have been helpless if not for Raine and Anton. I don't like that feeling."

"Hm."

Not an ideal place to start, maybe. Pepper considered that for a moment. What Valdis had experienced of Meira was limited in terms of understanding her past, and therefore had limited use in that regard.

But... "I don't think anyone does. But we all are sometimes, and-- that's not a bad thing. It's important to lean on people who care about you." Isn't that what a pack was supposed to do? "What about when you were drawing?"

"Pepper," Valdis sighed, "Leaning on others is difficult for me, every time I feel safe enough to do so, they leave." Dante. Wan. Anton. "It hurts."

She closed her eyes, trying to think back to the drawing and not about everyone she had lost.

"The drawings. I don't know." She sighed again, "I don't even know what I was drawing half the time and I haven't looked at any of them since I got my memories back."

Pepper blinked at Valdis for a moment before speaking. "You know you're not alone in feeling like that, right?"

Her words were soft, worried almost. It seemed to her that Valdis considered vulnerability a bad thing - and perhaps when faced with the Void, it was bad - and that might be part of the problem.

"Well, they were all really good," she said, quietly encouraging. "Maybe we could look at them together sometime, if you feel like it." Her mouth thinned to a line, wondering how to phrase what needed to be said in a way that wouldn't be too upsetting or rile the Void. "That thing thinks emotions make you weak, that they hurt you. And yeah, it's sort of right: if you feel, you feel the good things and the bad things. You feel the best and the totally, absolute worst. But that's just part of being who you are; things hurt because you care. Things hurt because you love. Things hurt because people do stupid things sometimes, because they're people. And hurting is important. Needing help is important. If you want to be able to fight this thing, you need to be willing to fight for what hurts and what you hate about feeling emotion as much as you're willing to fight for what's amazing."

Valdis stared at Pepper, uncertainty in her eyes, but that was a better feeling than anger. The girl was right. Emotion was more than just joy and the good feelings. Why hadn't she realized that? Why hadn't anyone else approached it like this? Why was this coming from a young girl with so little life experience compared to her own?

"Jeg forventet aldri visdom fra en som er så ung." She replied, looking down.

"The drawings are in my room, if you want to look at them."

Pepper wasn't quite sure what to make of the way Valdis was looking at her, but it seemed like what she had said had finally gotten through to her. Maybe they hadn't figured it all out, but that was a good first step.

She had no idea what Valdis said, only that it reminded her of the moments after she had hit Bakura and they ended up sitting shoulder to shoulder on the veranda.

"Sure," Pepper said with a nod, smiling again. "The one you drew of my in my armor is back in my room, and I love it. I'd love to see the rest of them."

Valdis put the bible down and slowly unfurled herself from the chair, stretching as she stood up to loosen her muscles. The she picked the book back up and headed to the door, leading the girl up to her room. Valdis dropped the bible on her bed on her way to her dresser. She opened a drawer and dug through it, reaching the very bottom where a closed and somewhat rumpled sketchbook lay hidden.

She pulled it out tentatively, still not certain she wanted to know what Meira had drawn, or if she would even recognize the faces within the book. She turned around and held it out to Pepper.

"Here."

Pepper followed Valdis at half a pace further away than she usually does, thinking that Valdis might want a little space. When they get to her room, Pepper took the offered notebook carefully, for all that it appeared to be ill-cared for.

She flipped through the pages slowly. "You actually captured Anton smiling," Pepper said fondly, brushing her fingertips along the edge of the sketch. There was one picture in particular she had wondered about - the man in bloodied armor. "You said this was your brother."

"He didn't smile often," Valdis replied, sitting down on her bed, not even bothering to look, "But when he did...it made me happy to see him smile. Not that I ever gave him much reason to..."

She frowned, "My brother?" She repeated, "I don't have a brother."

"Family isn't about only dealing with the good parts of people," Pepper pointed out gently. "If you love someone, you stick with them even if things get really bad. And Anton was always pretty straight-faced, anyway."

Utterly unaware of the possible rat's nest Pepper was about to walk into, she turned the sketchbook around so Valdis could look at what she'd drawn. "Well, maybe you don't, but Meira did. She - er, you didn't seem to know his name, just that he was your brother and he protected you."

Right again, though Valdis had managed to figure that one out. Family was family, no matter how bad things became. Anton had proved that to her on multiple occasions. She glanced over to see the image that Pepper had turned toward her, the one Meira had drawn of her brother. Except it wasn't some unknown person in the drawing. Valdis paled.

"Are you sure that Meira... that I said he was my brother?"

"Uh."

Valdis looked like she'd seen a ghost, and Pepper was suddenly wondering if this was a very bad idea. It was, however, somewhat too late. Perhaps it was just better that there was someone else with her for whatever revelation Valdis seemed to be having.

"Yeah, I'm pretty sure. I mean, it's been like a year, but I think so," she answered, turning the sketch back around. The face was only familiar to her for having seen the drawing before. "I'm gonna take a wild guess and say you know who this is?"

But it made some sort of twisted sense. Why else would Michael have left her alive after he found her when it was his job to destroy the enemies of Heaven? That didn't mean she had to like it though.

"That's Michael," Valdis replied, her voice very soft and quiet, "He owned Revelations before I did. He's the reason I'm like this."

"Michael, as in the archangel Michael?" They'd talked about this a while ago. "That's, um, weird."

It would make sense. The pieces fit. If Michael was her brother, he would try to keep her safe no matter what, even if it seemed like she was lost to him. At least, that's what Pepper would do, and what she thinks any good family would do.

"So... then Meira is an angel." Meaning Valdis used to be one. This was just getting more complicated by the hour. "You said before that Michael was super powerful - does that, like, run in angel families or...?"

She was so out of her depth here.

"Yes, as in the Archangel," Valdis replied.

The problem was that the pieces fit and they fit far too well to be a mistake. She couldn't tell if that was a relief or not.

"And yes...Meira was an angel too. Archangels are among the most powerful angels, the highest rank. I don't know what kind of angel Meira was, so I can't speak on that matter. I know that I am powerful and that power had to come from somewhere."

"Well." What was Pepper even supposed to say to all this? "I guess this explains a few things, then."

She looked at the sketch; so much meaning was made out of a simple drawing. Would Valdis have figured it out on her own? Maybe. Was it better now that she did know? Pepper couldn't say for certain, either, but at least now she had a few more pieces of the puzzle. The redhead could only hope that it would be a benefit the next time Valdis faced the shadows.

"Are you okay?"

"No, Pepper," Valdis replied, "I'm not ok."

But that wasn't exactly any different from her usual state of being. This seemed worse though.

"Pepper," She sighed, "If Michael is my brother, that means I killed my father."

"Oh."

....Welp.

"Oh, geez, I'm so sorry," Pepper said anxiously. She had definitely not meant to lead them down this path and she's not sure if it's something she can fix or if she should and really she had no clue how to deal with what was happening.

Also Valdis killing people and apparently archangels was a Thing, but Pepper mostly already knew that and it can be set aside as a hangup until a much later date.

"There-- There was no way for you to know," she offered gently.

If that was all Pepper had to say on the matter, maybe it wasn't ad bad as it sounded. Except Valdis knew, deep down, it was far worse than it sounded. Meira had had no reason to lie to Pepper and Valdis already knew that Meira was who she had once been. But that didn't change the fact that she should have known. How could a magic be so powerful that it made family unrecognizable.

"He was trying to kill me," she said quietly, "So I killed him first."

That didn't help either. Michael must be broken. It was he who had given her the opening, whether he meant to or not.

It was, very clearly, quite bad. This wasn't the sort of situation where things could be okay, ever. Not really.

"Then... then it was self defense." Even that argument wouldn't make it better, but it did ease some of Valdis' culpability. Pepper got up, determination written across her features, and planted herself in front of Valdis. "You couldn't have known who he was," she repeated firmly. "I'm not saying that makes it go away or improves anything, but that is important. The alternative was dying, apparently, and he probably did know who you were and tried to kill you anyway; you defended yourself." She paused. "I'm-- I'm sorry, I didn't mean to bring all this out."

Valdis sighed heavily. It was a lot to process, but the shock was fading, although slowly, and she was able to meet the girl's determined gaze evenly.

"It isn't your fault Pepper. The only ones who deserve any blame are the ones who made me like this in the first place."

Amos and Fenrir. But Pepper was right. Her father had known who he was fighting. He had given up on her then, not like Michael. She felt like crying. Half out of sorrow and the rest out of relief or perhaps even happiness. She had real family back home, that had to count for something.

Pepper didn't say anything to that, just tried to look at Valdis without anything resembling pity. She'd rather her see support and determination and worry, but not pity and definitely not fear.

And then she reached out to Valdis and hugged her. "If any of them show up here, I'm going to punch them," Pepper declared, fully aware that that wouldn't do very muc to whomever they might be.

Pepper was doing her best to understand, and to do so without judgement, a fact Valdis very much appreciated. She even managed a smile when Pepper offered to punch her enemies in the face.

"I appreciate that, Pepper," She replied, "In fact, I'd love to see that, but I don't think either of them would be able to come here."

Tomorrow morning when we wake

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