tushanshu_logs

[Bart had gone to the Earth Sector to try and find Barry. When knocking didn't produce any results, he'd driven Tim's bike around aimlessly for awhile. He'd been hoping to spot him on the street, but, somewhere around the Wood Sector, he'd admitted the idea of trying to play Spot the Speedster was ridiculous and started heading back to Tim's in the most direct route possible.

When he saw the cafe, Bart parked the bike, deciding to stop and pick up some food - well, a lot of food. There's a good chance that Tim stuffed himself into the fridge and ate his way out by now. While he's waiting for the order, he keeps trying to sneak glances at the old man who's sitting by himself. Obviously a foreigner, but not one that he's ever seen use the console. If he can even figure out how to use the console. Poor old dude - if he's even really old. After all, Zee's spell messed with Bart's age. It could've aged this guy up. There's something familiar about him that Bart can't quite put his finger on. Maybe it's that cranky doctor.

Another 'surreptious' look. It might be him.]

[Your surreptitious is Bruce's 'how in the hell is that not completely and painstakingly obvious'. Enough that it earns an annoyed glare. Tolerating speedsters takes a Herculean effort at the best of times, and although he has... something of a soft spot for those that have used the Flash name (he thinks about Jay Garrick, and legacies, and frowns) he isn't in the mood to be charitable.

But this does solve the mystery as to whose powers Tim received. Bruce arches an eyebrow at Bart, daring him to speak up.]

[The glare turns into plain ol' staring when the man started glaring at him. The familiarity is growing, like an itch that gets worse and worse the longer it goes unscratched. Given enough time, Bart would've come to the realization, but then the old man raises an eyebrow.

Enlightenment hits like an anvil.]

Holy shit.

[Batman! Bart's hand jerks up, almost to the point of covering his mouth, but he catches himself. Holy shit, that is Batman. Bart has gotten that exact look before. Oh no, Zatanna is going to get stalked forever for this one. Her spell hit two Robins and Batman. And he's old. He is nap time old. Pill box old. He looks older than Uncle Jay is, but Jay's got that whole speedster preservation going on. Bruce is... evidently not that lucky.]

I mean. Hi? You - uh. How've you been?

[This is not going well. He might as well've asked 'arthritis treating you good?' It's obvious that Batman is not going to be any help for fixing this thing, so scratch that off the list of solutions to pray for. Bart coughs a little and desperately tries to patch together a sentence that won't get more glares.]

I'm probably going to call out ~~slow~~ sick tomorrow. [Because the whole messenger thing is kinda contingent on being a speedster, and he's planning on keeping an eye on Tim.]

['Nap-time old'? Bart, you are so lucky Bruce is not a telepath. ... Honestly, the whole world's lucky that Bruce isn't a telepath, but one thing at a time.

Bruce's scowl deepens considerably, and Bart very definitely remains the central focus of it.]

Old.

[He snarls it out, because how do you think he's been, really.]

Do you honestly think this warrants a vacation? Work doesn't go away simply because of your [PAUSE FOR EFFECT BECAUSE BATMAN IS JUDGING YOU] 'disadvantages'.

[Yes, there's the word that Bart was dancing around. Bruce doesn't have to be that much of a curmudgeon about it. He's got Bart's sympathy. Lasering in with enhanced glaring capabilities will only spoil it.]

I meant besides that. I'm not blind. I mean what's up? Read any good books? Kick anyone's butt in chess lately? [Who is he kidding? Batman has no life.]

Ah, forget it. And that's not the whole reason. Tim said I can use his bike. [He gestures in its general vicinity.] I gonna see how Zee was getting with translations. And... other stuff. [Like putting Tim in one of those kiddie harnesses.]

[He makes an irritated hn.]

Do you expect to be able to help her?

[Every noise Batman has ever made sounds irritated to Bart's ears. Why should today be any different?]

I don't know.

[Well, now he feels stupid. He tries to console himself by being an honest sort of stupid.]

It's better than sitting around doing nothing and expecting her to dig us all out of this mess. If she knew how to do that, it wouldn't have happened.

[Good. That was the answer he was looking for.]

Magic can be tiring, especially at her age. You could always offer to make her dinner.

[Which is not the same thing as saying 'go hit on her' because he's fairly sure she's taken in a way that makes his brain cramp if he thinks about it too long.]

[He has a hard time believing that. Zatanna is vibrant. Vivacious. Bruce is probably concerned with her getting tired because he's tuckered out himself.

However, the suggestion doesn't get ignored. It's a good one. She's busy, and he's gonna be cooking anyway.]

I could be her Meals on Wheels, yeah. Not a bad idea. I can make the offer to anyone that's working long hours on it.

[That means you, Mr. Wayne.]

[This is why it's impossible to hate speedsters. For all their inanity, most of the ones that came down on the side of the angels are intrinsically good people. So while he remains scowling, it's... his slightly less judgmental edition.]

I'll live.

[Just in case you thought you were being subtle.]

[... his face really has frozen that way. Huh. Okay, that particular idiom is possible.]

Sure you will. The human body can go for weeks without food.

[Provided said human is given water and is reasonably fit at the beginning. That one is probably a huge problem here, because Bruce looks like he could die in his sleep as early as this evening.]

I'm dropping off dinner at seven. I don't run with the early bird special crowd.

[He wouldn't know subtle if it mowed him down with a steamroller.]

[Sourly,]

You don't know where I live.

[Are you seriously telling Bruce the facts of the human body? Bart, honey. No.]

[He'll tell anyone the facts of anything if it comes up. Why should Batman be immune? Besides, his exposure to Bruce's obsessive I-must-know-everything side is fairly limited and mostly seen through experience with and of Tim. In short, he has no idea it's a misstep.]

I'll send Tim.

[Send. Not 'weasel it out of', although there will be a strong attempt at that. Bart looks downright pleased at this quick retort. Ha, you thought you were escaping teenage homecooking, didn't you, old man? Not that easily. Besides, sending will be best. It won't get cold that way, and everyone can agree that cold pasta is the devil.]

Tim knows better than to side against me.

[Is he seriously getting into an 'I know you are but what am I' style argument with an aged-up version of Bart Allen? Yes. He is. And he's too stubborn to back down from it, to boot. Actual adult Bruce Wayne.

He coughs.]

I appreciate the -- attempt at being helpful, Bart. But I'll manage without your ['interference'] food.

[He's not about to admit that his system wouldn't be able to handle anything that Bart considers 'food', anyway. It's all prune juice and string beans from here on out, k.]

[Suuuuure, he does. Tim has done everything you ever said. He's never been influenced by his friends or let them do something that Batman Would Not Approve.]

Uh-huh.

[He's only half-listening, but that's OK because he's disregarding everything Bruce says. Quite blatantly.]

You can't stop me on this one. I don't care what happens to it after the drop off.

[That is the most depressing existence to resign yourself too. What if they made a flatbread tomato pie, really light on the cheese and spices? Surely, that would be okay. Old people love tomato juice.

[He didn't say he hasn't, only that he knows better. Which, truthfully, he does.

Bruce gives Bart the veritable glare of death, and says nothing for a long time. Then,]

Fine.

[It's not a surrender, it's a tactical retreat. He has better things to do than waste time arguing over this particular conversational venue.]

open!

water sector, cafe

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