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Characters: Kon-El (

andaway) & Hayley Stark (

everylittlegirl)
Date: Backdated 14th January
Location: Café at Metal Sector
Situation: Hayley asks Kon for a favour and wants to say something.
Warnings/Rating: None to start with? Probably no change to it? Maybe...

Kon had had time to think about the favour he agreed to with Hayley. She had been right that Kon didn't owe her anything, and he had meant it when he said he wasn't doing this for her. Kryptonite was a serious issue and he wanted to see this whole incident put to rest. He didn't know if it could be put completely behind them, but handing the rock over would at least be another step in the right direction.

He'd made his way to the spot Hayley had marked out on the map in the right sector. He was early, but he had a lot on his mind and being honest, the wait to even come here had been enough to drive him almost mad. She was going to have the Kryptonite in a lead case, Kon was going to be close to it, and that made him cautious. That made him worried. He knew she wouldn't so anything, but what if someone grabbed it from her? What if there was a crack in it and as she got closer, he got weaker and sicker? What if a bird fley in, grabbed the case and it sprung open with the chunk falling at his feet? Okay that last one was ridiculous.

Kon stood wringing his hands together as he waited for Hayley. His stomach was beginning to twist and flip the more he thought about it and the longer he waited. He was growing nervous pretty quickly. Be cool S.B. be cool! Don't want to actually look like a total dweeb.

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Hayley's expression hardened when he mentioned lying to her being the smartest course of action, her muscles tensing. It hurt to hear him say it and there was a deep understanding in those words that, no matter what she did, he would probably never trust her again. Not unless he could understand.

"Would I be friends with someone with secrets? Yeah, of course. Everyone has secrets. And well, okay, most of them aren't as big as yours, but I'm not going to rule someone out for lying." She crossed her arms with the sudden feeling of vulnerability that set in.

"You said you understood why I was afraid and why I attacked you, but you keep acting like I'm.. I don't know. A villain? If I had known who you are, it wouldn't have happened. And I'm not- Obviously I'm not blaming you, but I'm not going to tell anyone and I-"

She swallowed hard, trying not to let the hurt filter into her tone. Her expression was pained.

"I'm not that person, Clark. The things that happen here aren't even close to possible in my world. I'm fifteen. I'm not- I'm not trying to make excuses, I know it was bad. ..No one prepared me for any of this. No one even prepared me for middle school. I make it up as I go and so far, yeah, I've done an okay job with some terrible mistakes. I'm not a hero and I might not even be a good person, but I'm trying not to be a bad one. I'm really trying."

"You're not a villain" Was his quick answer. He was pretty sure Hayley had chosen her wording carefully, but he still couldn't help but reassure her- and it was the truth, anyway. She was no villain. She might have the potential in her, yes, but most people her age did. Puberty was a crossroad and not many people choose wisely during it.

"I wouldn't let a villain become close to my own family." He motioned to Kon-El. Now it was Kal's turn to be glad she'd brought him. He might not trust Hayley, but Kon... the fact that Kon was here, the fact that Kal didn't mind that he had become close with Hayley proved there was hope for them. In his eyes, at least. "But that's- that's kind of the point, Hayley. You say you wouldn't have done that if you had known who I really was.

Well, this" He motioned to his S-shield. "This is who I am. You can't draw a line in the middle and decide which part of me you can keep, and which scares you. The whole of me had to 'lie' to protect people and would do it again, even if you don't understand it. The whole of me has powers, and the whole of me happens to truly, actually and honestly love being a journalist.

I understand you are fifteen. I understand you made mistakes. Do you understand who I am?"

Edited 2014-03-14 23:29 (UTC)

His immediate reassurance genuinely made her feel a little better. Maybe it was because of Kon's understanding, or Clark's forgiving nature, or one of a dozen other reasons. Whatever the case, she felt like maybe she did have a chance of being okay with him again at some point in the future. Maybe not right now, but sometime.

She glanced back at Kon with Clark's motioning and gave him another smile before returning her gaze to the elder hero. The smile faded as she thought about how to answer and to explain her own perception.

"It's easy with Kon," Hayley replied tentatively. "Bart, Invincible, Bruce, Tony- even Barry.."

Nope, not the right way to start. She began again. "I didn't draw that line, Clark. You did. You made Superman and Clark Kent different people. You talked to me in different ways, you stood differently, you wore different clothes, you gave different advice and reassurance.. I could tell Clark Kent cared about me, but Superman wasn't personal.

Kon and Bart and those guys? They treat me the exact same in costume or out of it. Half of them admitted right away about their other side. And, look, I'm not saying you should have trusted me with your secret. I wouldn't have trusted you. But you created two completely different people and expected me to like and trust them the same."

She lifted a hand to scratch at her hair. "I get it now.. That you're both. Or, I mean, logically I know it? It's kind of hard believing it- Like if you found out.. I don't know, that Lois Lane and Sharon Carter are the same person. It's going to take awhile to sink in."

A dismissing movement with his hand. "I drew the line because it's there, because it's needed." He didn't mention the other's identities. Tony wasn't from his world and neither was Bruce- he didn't even know Bruce had a secret identity, but he'd always tried to give the man some space after he'd asked for him to stop The Other if it was needed. Maybe The Other was his secret identity.

But he knew the others kept their secret identity just as much as he did, specially Barry and Mark- the latter he'd even had to trick him into admitting it when he had started getting suspicious. He wasn't sure how Hayley had gotten the idea he was the only one with one, but that honestly wasn't his problem- those he wanted to protect knew, those who loved him understood and encouraged him. He didn't feel he needed any kind of justification about keeping one.

"But both of them are a part of me. And you only truly care about one, you're only apologizing to the one behind the glasses. This is why I'm wearing this uniform, this is why I came as Kal-El.

Can you honestly tell me you'd have felt any guilt about what you did if you hadn't found out who I really am? I promise, I swear I will believe any answer you give me and drop the subject forever. But I want you think about it."

Hayley shook her head in confusion at his words. "What do you mean you drew the line because it's there, but they're both you? I don't get it."

It didn't make sense to her. Thanks mainly to Bart's efforts, Hayley was beginning to understand the idea of Bart Allen and the Flash being different sides of the same person, which could reasonably be extended to Clark as well and seemed in line with what he said a moment before. But now he was talking about distinctions and lines drawn and that was something she didn't entirely comprehend.

It was nothing she had ever really had to deal with. The closest she had come was the people here finding out about what she'd done to Superman, but there was no fancy nickname or cool costume to go with it. She was just Hayley Stark.

To the latter, she intentionally paused to give it some thought. When she spoke, it was with decisiveness. "Not right away."

She took a deep breath to explain. "When I realized you were Clark, I didn't feel guilty. Not right away. I realized I'd made a mistake, sure, but I thought I had been doing the right thing. It wasn't until I talked to other people-" She gave an unconscious, partial glance back toward Kon as one such example. "-that I realized why it was wrong.

They still would have talked to me, even if I didn't know you were 'Clark Kent, journalist,' and I would have felt the same. I mean, I don't know if I would have given back the K.. I can't answer that. I didn't even know I'd do it now until I decided to. But apologizing? You being Clark made that way harder."

She paused. "I think Superman will always remind me of how I died and how I screwed up big time and Clark Kent will always make me feel safer, but I wouldn't still be here talking to you if I wasn't trying to trust both sides."

He tilted his head, letting her talk. So far he'd been the one doing the talking, trying to soapbox her into understanding- but if he was going to see Hayley's point of view at all he had to listen.

"I..." He let out a sigh, reaching to run a hand through his hair. "I guess we both have to take that and go from there, then. I can't leave all of it behind, and I still think telling you you couldn't have Kryptonite wasn't a mistake.

Even if I had known the outcome I'd have done the same." Again, not something that he really hoped to make her understand. He was just glad he hadn't, as far as he knew, talked to Lois or Bruce about it- if anyone understood why others shouldn't have Green K, it was them... but they would also probably been less nice when it came to explaining it.

"If you are willing to get past that to keep our friendship, then I am as well."

Hayley understood not changing your mind about a decision, knowing what would result from it. She respected that tenacity. It was the same reason she still wasn't entirely convinced that Superman hadn't needed to be brought down a peg, even if her methods were the wrong way to go about it.

But like he would never understand the justice she sought from him as anything other than corrupt, she would never understand his refusal as anything other than selfish. She only hoped it was something they could move past. It meant placing a level of trust in him that was still relatively new to her and definitely uncomfortable, but Clark Kent, Superman, of all people, seemed like one of the best people to try with.

"Okay." It was her own form of agreement, struggling for the right words. "I mean, yeah. I want to try."

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